When Ruth gets difficult...

she can be extremely hard to appease.

In the last weekend, she displayed such a wide range of behaviours it was bizarre. But it must have been even weirder and stranger to her, than it should have been for us. It's possibly very new and scary when you have abilities but no control over them. How you can suddenly feel happy and sad, overwhelmed, loss of appetite, pain, frustration, tired, anguished, etc and not know what all these are, or how to deal with them - and if you need/should deal with them.

Repeatedly, i find myself rebuking myself for trying to find a reason for her behaviour...cuz somewhere in me, i find that there shouldn't have to be a reason for everything. Hell, sometimes i'm pure frustrated but just can't figure out why too.

So here's my little active girl, who needs to be continually engaged and perhaps just needs a break from it all. Perhaps she can't quite figure out all these emotions, decisions, etc that are bombarding her...thus refusing to be carried, refussing to walk and just plomping her butt down on the floor - no matter where she is - refusing to budge.

My girl.

But her newfound smile is awfully heart-warming and would melt away any frustration we feel. Ask for her sweet sweet smile/pretty smile and she'll flash you one so wide, with the smallest eyes possible. :P